San Joaquin Valley National Cemetary

July 22, 2015 - I went to a funeral today. I generally don't do funerals. I will go to a funeral if I was close to the person who passed or close to someone in their family. Even then I won't usually travel for a funeral because I would rather take the time to write something and send a card that is a little more personal than standing in line to tell someone that you're sorry for their loss. Is that the right attitude? I don't know but it is my attitude and I'm really the only one who has to live with my decision to attend or not to attend.

That's what made it so unusual for me to attend this funeral. I didn't even know the individual whose funeral it was and I didn't know his family. As a matter of fact after attending the funeral the only thing I know about the man is that he was a Vietnam Vet whose daughter had very little funeral and a request was sent out on social media for other vets who could to attend. I felt that it was the right thing to do and I'm glad that I did.

I drove about 45 miles to the San Joaquin Valley National Cemetery and actually participated in the service as a member of the flag line, holding an American flag throughout the service along with other men and women veterans who came because they felt that it was the right thing to do.

In spite of my reluctance to attend funerals, I'm glad I went, the Veterans family was overwhelmed by the show of veteran support and I'm proud that I was part of it.

There is some irony in all of this as well. Last Wednesday the 15th I found out that my middle brother had passed away on Monday. He has not spoken to my sister or I since my Dad passed away and he took exception to the fact that I notified him initially by text. I didn't see anything wrong with that then and still don't. My Dad was on comfort care meaning that it was just a matter of time and all of my siblings knew that he was dying. When he passed Donna and I were with him and our concern was letting everyone know as soon as possible so we used text messaging with plans to follow up with phone calls after we took care of everything with the hospital. As I said, John took exception to that, wrote back a scathing text and has never spoken to either of us since. I don't believe that he's spoken to Carol or Rob either. It's really sad but that is simply who he was. Back to the irony of me attending a funeral of someone I don't even know and whose name I still don't know; My siblings and I were told that we were not welcome at my brother's service by his oldest son Joey, the only one we were to have any contact with. My prayer is that my brother John has found the peace that he never had while he was here on earth.